Mar 31, 2020 in Sociology

How And By Whom, Should Children Be Taught Appropriate Behavior?

All people live in a society which requires particular behavior. Children are taught appropriate behavior in different ways and by different people. Some argue that school has a primary duty to teach children how to act properly, and others think it is a duty of parents. In my opinion, both parents and teachers are responsible for teaching children appropriate behavior. I will support this essay with following arguments.

It is known well that schools are important for the social development of children, and many of them respect teachers and try to do their requirements. Thus, schools should try to teach children appropriate behavior. I think that school should be responsible for teaching children manners because kids spend a significant amount of their time at school with their teachers and friends. Therefore, as children spend as much time at school as with their parents, or even more, the school should be responsible for teaching them good manners.

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Responsibility of School for Teaching Manners

Nowadays, many teachers are concerned about children’s manners and behavior. It is obvious that modern children do not always have much time with their families. As a rule, both parents are busy with work, and children only see them in the morning and evening. Hard-working parents are often too tired to speak to their kids or teach them. In addition to spending much time at school without families, “modern” children are deeply involved in the Internet and other activities that make them more and more separated from their families. As a result, it is not possible to teach children manners in families only. At the same time, teachers in schools often face inappropriate behavior and manners of their students. Thus, teaching them how to act properly is vital. Otherwise, studying at school will become hard due to the problems with the bad behavior of some students.

Importance of Teaching Kids at Primary School

Teachers are responsible for the demeanor and manners of children because they influence directly a learning process and its efficiency for the whole class. Thus, some schools are forced to teach children manners starting from primary school. The questionnaire among British teachers showed that many of them are worried about the behavior and manners of modern children who are ruder than they were before. Undoubtedly, inappropriate behavior at school is not normal, and it may disturb other children as well as the teachers. If the child behaves badly at school and nothing is done about it, he or she is likely to continue in adult life, and the social environment of this child will suffer. Thus, schools should teach good behavior as well if parents failed to do that. Otherwise, problems at schools and society will continue.

Need for a Special Training

The children find it difficult to practice the appropriate behavior. It is becoming harder if parents do not have time for teaching, and therefore, schools have to take this role in order to improve the situation. Bad behavior of kids is often a result of increased demands from parents and school, and they do not know what to do because demands can be controversial. Thus, it is necessary to implement a special training for children concerning the proper behavior , which can be provided by their families or school. Such training may include principles of discussion of social situations, managing emotions, and ability to solve problems.

There are also arguments against teaching behavior and manners in schools. Some people argue that only parents have enough influence to teach their children right demeanor. 

The Parents’ Essential Role

The first counter argument is that only parents should be responsible for teaching their kids appropriate behavior and manners because schools already have many different responsibilities and find it difficult to combine teaching good manners and explaining other duties. Thus, school should only provide education, which is their primary duty, and only the family should be responsible for teaching manners. 

However, this argument can be refused, because not only schools are overloaded in the modern world. In fact, parents have more duties compared to schools, for instance, most of them work for a full day and take care of basic needs of their kids including clothes supply, food supply, and education. At the same time, schools are mostly teaching, and their additional obligations are limited. Moreover, children spend much time there. Thus, it would be fair for both parents and schools to teach children behavior. Adding a couple of lessons to teach behavior is not a difficult task but it can be very useful.

Difficulties with Teaching Big Classes

The second argument against teaching manners at school is that it is very complicated, because there are many students in a class. Thus, it is easier to teach manners at home where there are one or several kids only. 

Social Benefits of Teaching Manners at School

This argument can be opposed, because if a school fails to teach behavior, consequences will be negative, and they will be much more negative for the whole class or school than for a single family. For example, the British teachers often notice the growing problems with ill-mannered kids in schools, and many of them think that the number of poor-mannered children is growing due to the failure of parents to teach them behavior. If the whole school or class suffers from the unacceptable behavior of one or several classmates, it is a bad experience for many kids, which can negatively affect their study process and mental health. Thus, teaching manners at school is vital for social benefits, especially in situations when parents fail to teach their kids good manners. Consequently, if one family failed to teach educate their children properly, the whole class suffers. Moreover, another benefit of school teaching manners is that it will prevent bad behavior of a student in future, when he/she becomes an adult.

Beneficial Effects of Home Environment

The third argument against teaching manners at school is that this process is related to the family, and it will be hard to do at school the things that are usually done by parents. For example, teaching children how to act properly includes such elements as love, clarity, modeling, rewards, and punishments. Those elements are easy to be provided in the families. For instance, parents should love their children and be clear with them. The home environment of a ch ild has beneficial effects as he or she clearly sees models of appropriate behavior and copies them. Finally, they receive rewards or undergo punishment depending on their behaviors. However, at school, teacher cannot implement those elements in a full form because there are many kids, and it is hard to love them, to provide rewards and punishments for everybody. Thus, the family is the best place for teaching behavior. 

The following argument can oppose against such statement. Nobody states that only schools should provide behavior education. Both families and schools should do it. Thus, if the efforts are combined, school can provide only some elements of teaching children appropriate demeanor. For example, it can set clear behavior rules and models of behavior that children should respect and follow. At the same time, families should provide love, reward, and punishment.

To summarize, behavior education is important for children, and there are constant debates regarding the question who should provide it – schools or families. In the essay, I attempted to prove that both families and schools are responsible for it. They should unite their efforts in order to get the best result. If children are taught appropriate behavior and manners in both families and schools, it will be beneficial for families, schools, and society as a whole.

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